


feels like this could be forever right now

by bellawritess



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Band Fic, Based on a One Direction Song, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Late Night Conversations, M/M, Nostalgia, References to Alcohol, Songfic, drunk boys, i guess there's like a dash of angst but, i just got caught up in the Friendship of it all, i know this has ship tags but it's not relationship focused sorry, i think this is becoming my brand, it's about the friendship bro, it's blink and you miss it, like. basically, mentions of one direction because i love myself, sentimentality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-15 10:22:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28687056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bellawritess/pseuds/bellawritess
Summary: If time was ever going to freeze, Luke thinks to himself, he’d want it to freeze right now, in this moment. If it were up to him to stop all the clocks and pretend that the passage of time was a myth, he’d do it in a heartbeat; if he could pick one night to last forever, he’d pick this one.
Relationships: Luke Hemmings/Ashton Irwin, Michael Clifford & Luke Hemmings & Calum Hood & Ashton Irwin, Michael Clifford/Calum Hood
Comments: 12
Kudos: 25





	feels like this could be forever right now

**Author's Note:**

  * For [elivigar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elivigar/gifts).



> happy birthday [anna](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elivigar) <3 you wrote me a one direction songfic ([this FUCKING INCREDIBLE fic based on change my mind](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26738911), please please please do yourself a favor and read it it's one of the best things in the world), so it felt fitting that for your birthday i wrote you one. this fic is based on a.m. (shoutout to [taylor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jbhmalum) for suggesting it and also to the club for providing me many suggestions when i asked what 1d songs would be the best inspiration for fics) and i honestly was going to write you some cute lashton but then i just got swept up in the friendship and bromance of this so like, there is lashton (and malum) but..............anyway. i'm not gonna talk your ear off, you can read
> 
> before you do, though, i just want to say, anna, you are such a joy of a person to know. you are a reliable friend and you make me laugh and your sarcasm is always a welcome reprieve, and in general you just truly are a wonderful person that i am glad to know <3 i also am deeply in awe of your writing prowess and hope to one day be as thorough as you in my research. i probably won't be because i'm not clinically insane but i sure do admire you for putting in the work :) anyway love you a lot, if you ever need fic prompts you know i am your guy
> 
> tw for references to alcohol, drunk boys
> 
> title obviously from a.m. by one direction! enjoy <3

It’s three in the morning when the four of them finally stumble back to the hotel, but nobody is tired.

The only person showing signs of drowsiness is Michael, and they all know Michael is too stubborn to be the first to cave, and that he’ll stay up as long as anyone else is up. None of them want to go to sleep, though. Even drowsy, Michael’s eyes are sparkling. And Luke, at least, feels alive in a way he often doesn’t. There are different ways of feeling alive — the adrenaline of a performance, the comfort of a kiss — but this one doesn’t grace him often. It’s the kind that makes him want to cling to his friends instead of letting them roam free, to remind them that of all the things he has in the world nothing is more important than them.

They all end up in Luke and Ashton’s room, spread out on the floor. Calum’s back is against the bed and Michael’s head is on his lap, hair slowly detangling from Calum’s fingers dancing through it. The laughter they’d brought into the room is still kind of lingering even though nobody’s laughing anymore; it hangs in the air, keeps a smile on Luke’s face. Leaning against the door, Ashton is also smiling. Mostly, he’s smiling at Luke. Fortunately this only makes Luke smile more. The exchange of smiles grows until they both start laughing again.

“What are you laughing about?” Michael asks. “Did I miss something?”

“Nope,” Luke giggles, shifting nearer to Ashton and leaning his head on Ashton’s shoulder. Ashton squirms and moves away.

“Hang on,” he says when Luke makes an offended noise. “Let me get water.”

“You take good care of us,” Luke teases as Ashton gets to his feet. “Thanks, mum.”

“Of course, son,” Ashton deadpans as he disappears into the bathroom. Luke snorts.

“You guys have some weird shit going on,” Calum says. “He just called you son.”

“Yeah,” Luke says. “I called him mum. It makes sense.”

“It makes sense that your boyfriend calls you son?”

“It’s for the bit, Cal,” Luke says, sighing overdramatically. “You wouldn’t understand.”

“I know I’m drunk,” Michael says, “but neither of you are making any sense.”

Calum shushes Michael by putting his hand over Michael’s mouth. “Arguably, we are all drunk.”

“I don’t think that’s arguable,” Ashton says. He’s out of the bathroom with two cups of water. They’re the cheap paper cups that hotel rooms provide with the sole purpose of washing your mouth after you brush your teeth, but Calum takes his without complaint. “Get up,” he tells Michael.

“No,” Michael says, sitting up. “Thanks, Ash.”

“You’re welcome, children,” Ashton says, loyally adhering to the dumb joke. “Don’t want to wake up hungover, do we?”

“You make being drunk so much less epic,” Michael grumbles. “Whatever happened to our days of getting wasted every night and drinking it out the next day? We used to be partiers.”

“We were never fucking partiers,” Calum laughs. “What the fuck are you on?”

“Yeah, our _insaaaane_ parties and all the _craaaazy_ shit we got up to,” Luke says, wide-eyed. “All those girls we made out with and windows we broke.”

Michael makes a face. He swallows his cup of water in one, then holds it out to Ashton for a refill. Ashton, shaking his head slightly, returns to the bathroom. Luke has yet to receive water but he doesn’t mind the wait. It’s cute that Ashton is so committed to getting them all hydrated.

“I don’t mean _school_ ,” Michael huffs. “I meant, like, when we were on Where We Are.”

Luke hums. One Direction certainly had drawn the party out of all of them, though a lot of that also had to do with being young and stupid and unaccustomed to being in the public eye. Hangovers were worn like badges of honour back then. The boys in One Direction had been good role models when it came to having a good time, but they were not the best examples of good behaviour. Nobody taught 5 Seconds Of Summer to be responsible with themselves, to behave. That was something they’d had to learn the hard way.

Where We Are feels a million miles away right now, though. The boys they’d been when they’d toured with One Direction are all but strangers now. “Nah,” Luke says, shaking his head. “That was alright, but this is better. Hangovers are the worst.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying.” Ashton finally returns to Luke with a cup of water, and Luke takes it gratefully and sips slowly from it. “You’re all welcome.”

“Thank you,” Luke says obediently. Ashton reclaims his seat against the door and accepts a kiss on the cheek from Luke. 

“Yeah,” Ashton says. “We used to get drunk just to get drunk. It was just an excuse to waste time.”

There’s a lyric in there about getting wasted to waste time, but Luke will have to think on it again when he’s sober.

“Some of it was alright,” Calum says. "Especially before we were legal. Remember that shitty playground near Norwest?”

“The place where I fell and scratched my leg?” Michael asks sourly.

Calum scoffs. “Obviously I don’t mean _then._ And anyway, you pulled me down with you, you cunt.”

Michael chuckles. “Oh yeah. I forgot.” Patting Calum’s thigh, he says, “Well, hey, you never let me go down alone, did you?”

“And I never will,” Calum declares, in a surprising show of sentimentality. Luke had expected him to bitch, but maybe Calum is feeling the same kind of affectionate nostalgia that Luke himself is experiencing. At these words, Michael smiles, assuaged.

“I liked that playground,” Luke says. He remembers sitting on the swings — well, he and Calum on the swings, Michael cross-legged on the ground, attempting to sabotage their swinging efforts by throwing pieces of mulch at them. They’d been drunk then, too, but for some reason none of them could think of anything they’d rather do but just hang out with each other.

Not much has changed, Luke muses, looking around the room. Years later, and spending time with his boys is still his go-to pastime. 

“I’ve still got the fucking scar from that, you know,” Michael says. He waves halfheartedly at his jeans, then says, “Which I would show you if I wasn’t in skinny jeans.”

“So have I,” Calum says. “You’re not special.”

“I’m a little special,” Michael says. “Luke doesn’t have one.”

“Don’t blame me because I was careful,” Luke says in his defence. “You’re the idiot who tripped on his own shoelaces.”

Michael makes a face at him. This counts twice that he’s made a face instead of a comeback. Luke starts a mental tally.

“Was that the same playground we went to to watch the stars?” Ashton asks, elbowing Luke. “I think I remember you saying something about that when you took me.”

Luke presses his lips together and thinks very far back. “Yeah,” he finally says. “I think so.”

“Oh, good,” Michael says. “I didn’t realise you took him there, Luke.” Turning to Calum, he says, “Remember we talked about showing Ashton? And then…why didn’t we?” 

“Then life got busy,” Calum sighs.

“In a good way,” Luke puts in.

“Yeah, but.” Calum snakes an arm around Michael’s waist. “Still. You lose a little bit, right? For everything you gain.”

“I wouldn’t trade it,” Ashton says. “One playground against the entire job we have? Nah, I wouldn’t trade a thing. Besides, I went with Luke, and honestly it wasn’t a very impressive playground.”

“Hey,” Luke says. “That was my most romantic move.”

“It was impressive _at the time_.”

“Damn right it was impressive.”

“It’s not one playground,” Calum says. “It’s everything in Sydney that we left behind to come do this. I mean, you guys can’t tell me you never think about it? That you never miss it a little?”

“‘Course I think about it,” Ashton says, slightly affronted. “And I miss it.”

“I miss it,” Luke says, because he does. He doesn’t miss Freemans Reach in particular — his part of town had never been very impressive, and Ashton is right, neither was the playground — but he misses recognising streets outside his house, misses waking up every morning in a bed he knew he’d fall asleep in that night, misses, sometimes, just being a kid in a class of other kids. If he’d never left, he’d be sitting at home right now wishing he were anywhere else, but having gone, Luke can at least acknowledge that there are things he wishes he’d never abandoned.

That’s the thing about a job like theirs: missing people becomes a fact of life.

“I’m not saying I wish we hadn’t done this or anything,” Calum continues. “I’m just saying, you can leave and still miss what you left.”

Michael shrugs. “I don’t know. I miss it sometimes, but I don’t usually have to. I brought the best part of home with me. They’re in my fucking band.”

“Come on,” Calum says, though a smile creeps onto his face unbidden. “That’s obviously not what I’m— don’t be cute when I’m trying to be emo.”

Michael laughs. “Being emo is _so_ 2012.”

“That’s what I’m _saying!_ ”

“What _are_ you saying, Calum?” Ashton says, grinning. “Sounds like a load of shit to me.”

“You guys all suck,” Calum complains. Luke can tell from the smile on his face that he doesn’t think that. “You’re the worst. See, this is exactly why I miss Sydney. Wouldn’t have to put up with you shitheads anymore.”

“You’d miss us too much,” Luke says easily. Calum just shakes his head. 

“Sydney feels really far,” Ashton murmurs. “Is it just me, or does everything feel…really, really far right now?”

“It might be that you’re drunk, babe,” Luke whispers.

Ashton huffs a laugh. “No, not like in distance. More like in…I don’t know, time.” He turns to look at Luke, a faraway smile on his face. “If time froze, I bet it’d feel like this.”

If time was ever going to freeze, Luke thinks to himself, he’d want it to freeze right now, in this moment. If it were up to him to stop all the clocks and pretend that the passage of time was a myth, he’d do it in a heartbeat; if he could pick one night to last forever, he’d pick this one.

“Yeah. I know what you mean.”

“Good,” Ashton says quietly. “That’s why I love you the most.”

Luke smiles and tilts his head against Ashton’s shoulder. “I know you are, but what am I?”

“What? That doesn’t even make sense.”

“Ugh, what is with you and making sense? Just talk out of your arse a little,” Luke teases, linking his right arm with Ashton’s left and lacing their fingers together. “Making sense all the time is for babies.”

“Don’t call me a baby, you baby.”

“ _You’re_ a baby.”

“Your _mum_ is a baby.”

“Hey. My mum is a treasure.”

“I know, you’re right, I felt bad the moment I said it,” Ashton says regretfully. “I’m sorry, Liz, if you can hear me.”

“She can,” Luke says wisely. “She can always hear you.”

“Me, specifically? What about you?”

“Nope, just you. And Cal.”

“What about me?” Calum breaks off his whispered conversation with Michael to ask.

“Nothing,” Luke says lightly. “Nothing, don’t worry.”

Calum squints suspiciously. “Are you guys chatting shit?”

“We’re not chatting shit,” Luke says, rolling his eyes. Calum still looks dubious. “Yes, Cal, we have absolutely nothing better to talk about than you and have decided that the best time and place to do so is while you are also in the room with us.”

“Okay, well.” Calum makes a face. Luke decides that Calum can contribute to Michael’s total on account of how they are roughly the same person sixty percent of the time and adds a line to his mental tally.

Michael yawns, and a moment later Calum yawns, which sets Luke and Ashton to yawning as well, which gets them all to laugh. As they quiet down, Calum says, “Might be time to call it a night, boys.”

Luke frowns. “No. Not yet.”

“You’re not tired?”

It’s not a question of whether or not Luke is tired. Now that he’s sitting down, at peace in a room that feels locked in an alternate dimension, of course he’s tired, but he doesn’t want to sleep. Doesn’t want today to become tomorrow. Doesn’t want Calum and Michael to leave.

“Just don’t…” Luke bites his lip. “Dunno. Don’t go yet. Stay a little.”

“Luke,” Ashton says gently, “it’s really late.”

“I know, but —”

“Alright,” Michael says, to Luke’s surprise. “We can stay. Or at least I can. I’m not that tired.” In an ironic punctuation mark to his statement, he yawns again. “Not that tired,” he repeats when he’s finished, while Calum shakes his head.

“Look, if you’re tired you can sleep,” Luke says, feeling a little bit embarrassed. “I just, I don’t know, I love you guys, and if you leave I’ll miss you.”

“We’ll be two doors down,” Calum says. He pauses. “But I know what you mean. It’s weird that we like each other this much, isn’t it?”

“Not to me,” Luke says. He looks up at Ashton, or at Ashton’s jaw or whatever part of Ashton’s face he can see. “If I didn’t like you all this much, the band would never have been this successful.”

“Same,” Michael says. “I love you guys so fuckin’ much. Don’t care if it’s lame to say. I’m still drunk, that’s my excuse.”

“Yeah,” Calum says, quietly lost in thought. “Yeah. I wouldn’t want to do this alone anyway.”

“I couldn’t,” Ashton contributes, squeezing Luke’s hand once. “If by some miracle I’d made it this far alone, I know I wouldn’t make it any farther.”

“We’re such a happy healthy band of boys,” Luke says. He can’t help the way his tone is laden with affection. However much he teases, he firmly believes nobody care more for these boys than he does. “Luckily you _do_ have us, Ash. We’re all gonna make it.”

“Some would say we already have made it,” Ashton says.

“You know what I mean,” Luke says. “Not just make it with the band or whatever. Make it through life. I know I will, at least. As long as it’s the four of us.”

“Jesus, Luke, did somebody drug you?” Calum jokes. “You’re awfully sentimental.”

“I’m just saying that I love you all and I’m grateful for you,” Luke defends himself. “And that I’m quite drunk.”

“Well, you know what they say. Drunk words, sober thoughts, et cetera.” Michael grins.

Luke points at him. “You said it too.”

“And I meant it.”

“Well, I’m not saying I don’t agree,” Calum concedes. “I’d be lost without you guys, you know? I’m grateful. I don’t think I’d know what to do with myself if I wasn’t doing exactly this with you guys. If it was anyone else it wouldn’t work.”

“Even Jack Barakat?” Michael asks (hopefully).

“You know, Mike, if Jack was in the band he would be taking _your_ place,” Ashton tells him. “Is that what you want? To be replaced by Jack?”

“If anyone’s going to replace me, I’d like it to be Jack at least,” Michael says solemnly. “It would be an honour and a privilege.”

Luke snorts.

“ _Even_ Jack,” Calum vows, pressing a kiss to the top of Michael’s head. “Plus anyway, I get to do my dream job with the love of my life. Which wouldn’t be true if it was Jack in the band.”

“Aww,” Michael says sweetly. “I’m the love of your life.”

“Now if it were Alex, then maybe —”

“I take it all back,” Michael declares. “Fuck you, Calum Hood.”

Calum laughs, and that sets Luke to laughing, which makes Ashton laugh, and before long they’re all laughing again, and Luke thinks about the bloke in _Mary Poppins_ whose laughter made him fly. This, Luke figures, is probably what he felt like.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading i hope you enjoyed it <3 i am actually a slut for friendship so! now you know. anna i love you and i hope your birthday is wonderful. everyone else, i'm on tumblr [@clumsyclifford](http://clumsyclifford.tumblr.com/) if you wanna come say hello! okay that's all love you bye


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